Birds Who Brunch: Breakfast, Booze & Boss Bitches


Seems a long time ago now, but one of my new year’s resolutions was to meet some of the many Instagram friends I’ve made over the years. Instagram has long been my most successful platform for the blog and where I’ve felt most ‘at home’. I’ve had lovely, supportive, and personal chats with many people who I’ve never met and, if I didn’t do something about it, never would. So I started Birds Who Brunch, a monthly (hopefully) get together of women who I’d met on Instagram but not in real life.

How it started

I’m a friendly person but my confidence isn’t always what it could be and when I gave up full time work to stay at home with my son it plummeted further. I’d lost touch with old workmates, lost other friendships, and realised that blogging and working for yourself can be quite isolating socially apart from the odd PR event and networking opportunity. 

The idea was first for me to invite some women who I’ve followed for a long time to come and join me for brunch. Then, if there’s anyone they’d like to invite in future then they can, gradually widening the circle and giving us all chance to meet new faces.

I’m a firm believer that in this day and age social media is the best way to make friends. We’re no longer beholden to friendships based solely on having gone to school with someone, having babies at the same time as someone, or through working for the same organisation.  Instagram in particular gives you the opportunity to get a feel for someone’s vibe before you even meet them. You don’t necessarily have to have things in common, and sometimes it’s nicer that way.

Who it’s for

Birds Who Brunch is for all women, and the reason for this is simply that it’s mate dates and I’m a woman. There’s enough ways to meet men or women for sex or relationships on the internet and this ain’t one of them. I’ve always had plenty of male friends but right now I want to focus on the girls. Some of us Brunchers have social anxiety type issues or other stuff going on that can knock your confidence or self esteem but that by no means applies to everyone. It just means it’s a safe space for women to get together in the daytime and forget about real life for a few hours.

There’s no age limit (as long as, I suppose, you’re old enough to bevy if you’re going to be partaking in brunch cocktails!), and is inclusive of everyone regardless of background, characteristics, so on and so forth.

It’s also ideal for people like me who have anxiety, who maybe have had big life changes or are new in town, want new friends or just more friends, don’t get out as much cause of work or kids or changing relationships, are going through a rough time, or I suppose just love Brunch!

What to expect

Our first outing was to the Brunch Club on Duke Street and ten of us met at 11am at a table I’d booked in advance. We all had something to eat, and most of us had a brunch cocktail or two – in fact about half of the group kept going all day! 

The Brunch Club, Duke Street

Everyone pays for themselves and we ask Brunchers to bring enough spare cash to leave a reasonable tip. Some outings will require a deposit in advance, payable to me, and some outings will be a set price e.g. for a Bottomless brunch. If you can’t make it then you don’t owe any of us an explanation but would have to forfeit your deposit so that we don’t mess the venue around too much. From the research I’ve done deposits are usually only £5 a head and I’d happily pay ten times that to get out of something I’d once agreed to when I was in a different frame of mind!

If you don’t fancy these types of outings where you have to cough up in advance then there will be plenty of others like our first one where you just turn up and pay on the day. I try to get an idea of numbers in good time though so that the venue doesn’t get too pissed off with numerous changes or surprises on the day.

You can leave whenever you need or want to, without any pressure, so if you want to go shopping, meet other friends, or need to go home or to work then there’s no set time to hang out until. Just pay for yourself or leave some cash and get off whenever you need to.

There’s no dress code so feel free to be as dressy or as comfy as you like. There was probably a good mix of strappy heels, flat shoes, and trainees are our first Brunch which I think reflected our personalities!

I hesitated to do this but before our first meet up I set out some ‘rules’ for Birds Who Brunch. They’re not really rules as such, more a kind of tongue in cheek way of highlighting the ethos of the gatherings. If you’ve ever seen Fight Club then these might sound familiar!

No shithousery or mingebaggery

The beauty of Birds Who Brunch is you can leave after the event and not have to keep in touch with others if you don’t want to. We all have other commitments and personal lives so there’s absolutely no pressure, but I know the first event was a great success and everyone was so warm and welcoming to each other that there was lots of following and friend requests going on over pancakes and Prosecco!

Get involved 

At the moment, Birds Who Brunch is solely on Instagram. I don’t really have time with my (many other, spiralling) commitments to take it to other platforms. And after all, it was Instagram that first inspired me to do it.

The way the Instagram account works is that if a Bruncher would like to invite someone from Instagram that they’ve never met before but would like to, then they invite that person themselves and ask me to request that person on Instagram. There’s no pressure on anyone to accept an Instagram request nor an invitation to Brunch. I don’t have to ‘vet’ the invitee if I don’t know who they are – it’s simply a vehicle for women to invite other women out without the pressure of a 1:1 mate date. After all, you might not hit it off with them as much as you think you might, but somebody else could!

The Instagram account is private just so that it’s only us who know when and where the next brunch will be, for privacy reasons and to avoid any unexpected numbers especially where deposits have been paid. It’s also to keep photos private but Brunchers are welcome to add each other on Instagram and share photos that others are happy with.

Nobody is expected to make it to every Brunch. The idea is that it’s an opportunity to look forward to – if you fancy it and happen to be free – rather than a commitment.

So if you like the sound of this and get a message from one of the Birds Who Brunch then now you’ll know what it’s all about. And if you’re not a bird or can’t get to Liverpool then maybe you might feel inspired to do something similar near you. Cheers! 

1 Comment

  1. Sophie
    April 15, 2019 / 7:47 am

    Oooh this sounds amazing!! I wanna coooome!!

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